dork junior's Journal

2:26pm: my fortune from dinner last night stated
"good things are being said about you"
luck # 06 07 09 25 29 45

1:54pm: this weekend started off rough like it always does with the one person do the one thing he always does to me. Some exciting things did happen thou. I got my nails done with mama and lunch with my two favorite girls= mama and dani. then dani and i went to the harbor and we kicked it with jose and tonio, and then we ended up talking to nick for 2 hours. Then we went out we saw berta..... awwe berta i miss him. OHH then saturday wow that was funn charles came home i got to see him and that was exciting, we went to jordons (danielle,i and reen came later)we had soo much funn. i will never forget it..... gabe came home on friday too yet i haven't seen him yet...whether or not i will makes me sad. today i might get a really bad phone call... seen how i sent him that box. i have a feeling he is going to call me and tell em he hates me but we will see.....
well i am off to do my online quiz now.
peas out
ps..if anyone has a small red cocktail dress can i brough it!!! please

1:50pm: this weekend started off rough like it always does with the one person do the one thing he always does to me. Some exciting things did happen thou. I got my nails done with mama and lunch with my two favorite girls= mama and dani. then dani and i went to the harbor and we kicked it with jose and tonio, and then we ended up talking to nick for 2 hours. Then we went out we saw berta..... awwe berta i miss him. OHH then saturday wow that was funn charles came home i got to see him and that was exciting, we went to jordons (danielle,i and reen came later)we had soo much funn. i will never forget it..... gabe came home on friday too yet i haven't seen him yet...whether or not i will makes me sad. today i might get a really bad phone call... seen how i sent him that box. i have a feeling he is going to call me and tell em he hates me but we will see.....
well i am off to do my online quiz now.
peas out
ps..if anyone has a small red cocktail dress can i brough it!!! please

9:41am: so this is what its about
soo yay my dani comes home today!!!!!
Okay this week has been a disater, it started semi okay. then it all went down hill way down hill....i felt like crap all week.. school, blake, marc, work it all sucks, but i have managed to flip it on a half way up side. well some of it i work out, school and work so i am trying to work it out. i am trying realy hard to stop crying all the time, every keeps saying keep your head up, and all i do id cry, and cry... well i thinks thats it...i am out, its sleep time before dani comes home.

12:25pm: i don't understand
I just don't get it, what the hell did I ever do to you to deserve this type of treatment....all I have ever been is nice to you. I helped you when you need it and I was there even when you hurt me a way you did... you were suppose to be my friend and you didn't act like it.... and now after you said everything was fine you have lied to me!!!! all I want is for us all to be happy and that is not good enough for you. You took something from me that meant so much and now its yours and waon't even talk to me. So now you want this to, did anyone ever tell you that your selfish!!!!!!!!!! Well fine screw you. I hate this point in my life. I just want it to all to work out....missing you!!!!!!

4:54pm: happy fing birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!;)
ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTS!!!!!!
I LOVE YOU BAYBA
CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUR TAT!
LOVE YA, YOUR LITTLE RED HEAD

6:23am: what do i do i am sooo freakin confused!!!!!help if you are a good guide please guide me out of the darkness. urg urg ahh i need one week away from everything, and i miss my wonderboy
happy birthday daddy yesterday and happy birthday marc tomorrow..

2:16am: let it burn
i have pictures, i miss my friends, disneyland was amazing last month. I have like a thousand pictures of dani and i and then there is this really cute picture of adam and i, i already miss him and i barely know him. he is awesome and tom sent me a message. wow i feel like i have no friends, ohh yeah thats because i don't well whatever...

11:36am: this is the burn
i just hate this sooo much i am sorry i hope you forgive me and it gets better. it burns mke too

10:52am: protect yourself
i don't know what to think and do anymore..... i feel it is out of my hands, and that scares me... not knowing whats next is hard. I just don't know anymore... how do i know what is true and how??????HELP.

11:11pm: what can i say
what hurts the most is think that somethings will last forever or at least till your done with them and then finding out there isn't a happy ending to you happiness. why does bad things tend to happen to good people. (or at least i thought i was a good person) i don't understand why you chose now not to like me, i never did anything to you. You hurt me first....another question why is it that when a bad thing happens then they all happen...... i am so blah blah urggg
whatever (fp)

3:20pm: i want to kiss you
sunday i got see my danielle and meet new wonderful friends and this weekend i am going to long beach to hang out with danielle. wednesday i skipped two classes because i was sick. i have been working a lot. i wrote a crazy paper in response to a rapper. what else is there to say but some perv called me at work last night it was grose.i got my nails done. and i think that is all!!!

12:41am: do you?
so my life is so freakin confusing everything just seems to get harder. I just wish I could explain it all but it get complicated....Urg. tonight something came up about marc and i told my moms friend she doesn't like him and pat(my moms friend)asked why and my mom said her reason which what she said was complete bull crap. and i was irrated the rest of the night and i took it out on marc so now he is upset at me and it is my fault.....
i hate this right now.... i have nothing and it hurts sooo much!!!!!!

8:36pm: opps
So i know i haven't posted in a week or so. sorry, been really busy i started school monday morning a full day of classes then i followed with work everyday. My classes are alright, kinda earlier but i will get use to it in a week or so. saturday reen and i helped danielle move into the dorms it was sad but she will be home all the time and we will go up there all the time. i know she is having fun and is making a lot of friends i just hope she doesn't for get her coaster girls. I got my laptop the other day and my printer today. I have been really having a hard time since school started i am hoping it will get better i saw marc on sunday that was really really hard. my mom is sick i have been taking care of her. I met a few people from my classes so far, but for the most part i don't know anyone. sad face i haven't talked to any of the people i usually talk to sarah bagel i miss you and blake well i don't think i have seen her since i don't know maybe 2 weeks . Well i think that is about it. hopefully my regular computer will stop being gay till my laptop works hopefully i will have that done by tomorrow. well peace.

5:39pm: word
So monday I turned 18 and went skydiving it was the most amazing thing ever, I am going to do it all the time.Then i went and got my belly button pierced it looks good, I like it. I am no longer going to street scene for certain reasons which i chose not to talk about.sad face.Tuesday i got my stero installed in my car it is pimp (haha i am a dork)!!!! I am nervous about school. my lap top comes in a week or soo. Yay!!!! that is about it! I am out.

6:48pm: 14 days
So in 2 weeks from today, I will be a college student without all of my friends. I stand there in a new world with no one to hold my hand and guide me or go thru my new journey with! BUt I can do it.. Progressive Dinner was a lot of fun and really sad. I did my back hand springon the trap and stuck it on my own. Tom leaves on thursday....and David on Saturday. I turn 18 in one week Yay!!! Disneyland tomorrow. YaY!!!!! that is about the end besides work.

12:10am: do you ever?
So I have been thinking a lot. Which sometimes that could be bad, because I am not the most knowledgable book on the shelf. BUT about life I do know, or at least my own. And what I believe and what I want. BUT the question is how come GOD doesn't just appoint the person your suppose to be with? And how do you know if the person your with is what GOD wants. LIke I know what I want, BUT the person youR with, what about them. Sometimes I wish I could look in a crystal ball and see my future. BUT other times I love not knowing and the fact that one day it all will be clear. YES! I do believe in krama and fath and love at first sight BUT the matter of finding it is BEYOND me. IF it is meant to be it will find you. DOn't look for it just let it do its job and find you cause thats the way its suppose to be (right)! I don't know why I am think about all of this now BUT I am. In less then 3 weeks a new part of my life is going to start, without you. And that scares me a lot. You are so far BUT I know you love me and your with me. YOur life is yours and mine is mine right. And if its right it will work BUT that what we have to wait for.
Everyone thinks they know what they want BUT the fact is in most cases if doesn't go that way. I know what I want BUT do I think it will happen that way. NO that is GODS job I may Die tomorrow with nothing but I will know that is what GOD wanted because there is something better for me. Grandma I know your watching and thinking wow, that is the grandchild i never got to meet yet she is me in her life. And PApa I miss you and Daddy too. Gma I love the piece of you that you left me with. And Fletcher he love you and so do I and thanks for watch over us.
THings get harder as you grow older. Well that is the end of my thoughts and passion right now.

12:44am: so in the past week
What have I done in the past hum worked and gone to school to fix a big problem but its all better now. I went and saw Little Black Book tonight cute sad but so good I went with the girls Danielle and Erika. Last night Danielle and I went fishing i caught 6 fish and danielle caught 4 it was fun. Then we went to In N'Out that was funny some guy was siting out side and signing his phone # to me so I wrote on a piece of paper the reject hotline and told him to call me in 5 for a good time *wink wink* Lisa(fake name) and gosh it was funny. The night before last Danielle and I went to my friend Carl's for a party that was chill. And some time earlier this week at night I went bowling with fish n' chips crew and Dani and then to the railroad tracks and Chris put change down and the train went by and flatten them it was great. I have been so busy but I am having fun too. Marc got a job I am so proud and the boss guy likes him a lot and wants to put him in general management position. Which that is so good!!! His 3rd day was today. I miss him, but hey I am holding on. My birthday is in less than two weeks!!! (August 23) Big 18 yah. I start school soon so excited!!!! I have met a lot of cool people this summer and this weekend is going to be so fun. Yah. And got close to other people and I love it. Well thats about it.I am out. Night all!

11:36pm: bah hahahaha
so tonight i went and saw the village good movie, i am still working on my room it is coming along. tomorrow no work again yay. and as you can see i didn't go to sixflages sad face(because blake got sick yesterday) the end i am feeling a little sad right now for may reasons i just can't understand why now i am feel sad thou......

12:51am: life
i am home and i have been but busy as heck!!!my trip was great but i am glad to be home i miss my friends and my family. and there are no laws there driving is insane. i got a new phone bc i droped mine in the toilet while i was there. i went horse back riding, white water rafting, propelling down a waterfall. clubing (kinda) shopping the beach, hot boys the cutes one ever hit on me and kissed me live in oklahoma city works a abacromie (sp) thats right. ohh my gosh shein and his dancing, rosy and allie i am pissed that girl is a mayor slag.. wow i had fun. camp the war with omad ryane my adopted sister for 2 weeks i love that girl......marc no longer has a cast but still a broken foot. gabe is gone i am sad. i miss my girls!!!!!!tuesday sixflags, and then i have everything else i will be 18 soon and college starts and street scene that is going to rock. i am excited!!! ohh and toby keith yay!!!! redoing my room a lot of work. then end more another day.......

5:26pm: wow mom
okay so i have been so freakin busy!!!!! i ran all over the place today and packing to leave tomorrow! marc left today to him new house that was sad :( gabe and i haven't seen each other since before he left i don't think i am going to see him till october.....well i went to school that was so cool i am soo excited. my first day is august 30th. and i think that is it i will post when i come home on the 27th~!!!!!much love. peace

12:58pm: got fish?
i haven't really done anything exciteing in the past while!!! but i did go to the fair on saturday it was a lot of fun and the 4th was pretty chill, except i am not feeling good right now. i leave in 9 days and gabe came home on saturday that was happy but i haven't seen him yet. i have registration on thursday(scary yet sooo exciting)that is about the end

2:36pm: blue whale
i really don't have anything to say but i am sad you are leaving and i don't know what to do about you i love you and your my best friend and i hope you are careful!!!

if you don't know me you won't understand what i am saying that is about two people! the end

10:33pm: i soo scared and sad its over!!!!!

10:37pm: boy glow

this is me having what girls call boy glow do you see it

do you do you???? but at the same time it is sad, because he comes along and makes thing grand and yet he moves on the 20th of this month :( sad face but the time we have now is fun.

boy glow